The few days before a dentist appointment, you’d think I have perfect dental hygiene. I’m not a regular flosser, but those days leading up to my dentist appointment, I floss twice a day and brush super well. For some reason, I convince myself that these few days of flossing will make up for all the days that I wasn’t as good over the past few months. I know that I won’t be able to get rid of the build up of plaque, but it makes me feel better knowing that at least I was good for the week before my appointment, whether it actually made a difference or not.
I have this same attitude when it comes to my quarterly endocrinology appointment. Even though my endo will be staring at my A1c number, a three month summary of my blood glucose numbers, I convince myself that if I’m really “good” for the week before the appointment, it won’t be as bad if my A1c is higher than I want.
“Yes, well 7.8 isn’t what I was going for, but look at how good my numbers have been the past week!”
So the 7-10 days before my appointment, I am extra vigilant. I test my bg more often. I stop swag (scientific wild ass guess) bolusing and am more accurate in my calculations. I try super hard to remember to pre bolus. And usually my blood sugars a week before my appointment are pretty good. Still not perfect, but typically better than other weeks. Since my doctor usually brings a printout of the past 2 weeks of my blood sugars, I feel better having at least one week of pretty good numbers even though that 1 week really won’t make much of a difference for my A1c. My doctor still sees the trends and helps me to adjust ratios and rates, and I feel like I have something positive to contribute to the conversations.
So the question then becomes, why don’t I pretend every week is the week before an endo appointment? Well I’m trying. It’s hard to maintain that constant level of vigilance. But yes, ideally that is the goal. It’s like the Tim McGraw song, “Live Like You Were Dying” except it should really be “Live Like Tomorrow is Your Endo Appointment.”
So tomorrow I have an appointment with my endo. If you recall, my last appointment was great. A .8 drop in my A1c to the low 7s, the lowest in years. Tomorrow’s appointment? I’m not hopeful. I can tell that it’s going to be higher this time, I’m just hoping it’s not too much higher. And I’ve been on vacation the past 4 days. That week of good blood sugars? Yeah not so good. Lots of spikes and dips and highs that take hours to come down.
So pretty much I’m not looking forward to tomorrow’s appointment at all. I’m nervous, anxious, disappointed, and slightly defeated. But probably most important, I’m still determined.
Good luck at your appointment tomorrow – I hope it's better than you expected, and even if it isn't please don't be hard on yourself! Diabetes is so hard and even when we try our best things don't always work as they should.
Oh, and me? I'm always extra sloppy about diabetes on the week after my endo appointment. It's like I know that week won't really show up in my next appointment, so I don't sweat it as much as I usually do.
Thanks Karen! I know, I'm going to try not to be disappointed or discouraged. That's funny but also true about the week after the appointment. I hadn't thought about that, but I probably do the same thing too!
Great post and I can totally relate. Plus a holiday weekend like we just had, at least for me always throws things off.
You really should floss everyday
Haha, coming from the dentist. I know, I'm working on it!
Thanks! Yea holidays are hard, really anything different from your normal schedule
I totally agree – with both the dentist and the endo! But I hope it went well, and hopefully you got some good surprises too (other lab work results better/good, etc?)I think it is important, at the end of the day/week/month/year, to just remember, going into your Endo apts, they should want to work with you where you are AT. THEN and NOW. They should strive to help you work with the things you ARE doing on a consistent basis 🙂 Keep up the good work!
Thanks, it ended up going really well! But I agree with focusing on what you are currently doing and places where you can improve right now. That's the first step to bigger changes and reaching larger goals
I think we're all like this! 🙂